At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Randomize
