I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
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