I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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