You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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