We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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