i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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