i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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