Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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