dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Randomize