batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
