So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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