She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
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