She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
