lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Randomize
