My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Randomize