clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
