If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
