He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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