I hope mine doesn't look like that
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
