I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
People in love make me want to vomit
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
they call him Oral-B. enough said
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Randomize