im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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