dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Semen is not good for contacts.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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