Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Why is your signature on my underwear?
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
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