She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
