While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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