After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
Randomize
