everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Randomize
