The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Randomize
