your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
