I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
