I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
She announced her abortion via fbk
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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