but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
