I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Randomize
