she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
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