How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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