we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Randomize