thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Randomize
