Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize