yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Randomize
