When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
