belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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