hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
