Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Randomize
