Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
