So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
