He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
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