Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
