We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
