Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Randomize