Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
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