a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
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