I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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